Taking Off My Excuse Bag and Do Not Disturb Sign: On Being Neighborly

Take Off Your Excuse Bag and Help People

Two nights ago I went to watch a televangelist I have been following for 12 years in person at my church. It was pretty cool. I was only 7 rows back, and I got to really enjoy her. I raised my hand at the end of her teaching when she asked who was willing to pray every day for God to put someone in their path that they could help. I had been doing this a bit on my own to a degree, but nothing concrete or committed as she had proposed. I prayed a few weeks back something to this degree, and I’d got a word about being hospitable and vision of a neighbor of mine. I took it to mean it was time to invite her over for coffee or tea. I have been in this place for two years, and though she was neighborly right away, I never followed up though I did go into her place awhile back and listened to what she was going through and prayed with her about her job situation. I had my “Do Not Disturb” sign on and my “Excuse Bag” as to why I couldn’t hang way beyond my time here. These are two props, Joyce, the televangelist, used to describe how many of us Christians, especially, behave when people may need us. I have been guilty of these for years, particularly the “Do Not Disturb” sign. So, after the service was over, I went to the prayer partners for help in being able to commit to this because I know how I am, and I know that love is a big deal – it’s all action and time and commitment and self last, and that is a large reason I am NOT in a relationship and haven’t been in about 12 years.  

So, yesterday, the day after the event, and the first evening after my first morning prayer to put someone in my path I could help, my neighbor I had the vision about and I happened to cross paths. I was on my way to do laundry, and she was too apparently – her place right next to the laundry room and her door open, I called in, “Hi Sharon.” She came out and we began chatting, and yes I felt a little hi-jacked and wasn’t wanting to have this lengthy conversation at that moment, especially on that hot, Florida summer day next to the rolling dryer. I wasn’t ready to invite her over though, but I was willing. I remembered my prayer and the the nudge I felt I’d gotten weeks earlier from the Holy Spirit about her and hospitality. So, when I realized I did not think this was ending, I eventually told her she is welcome to come over for tea or something if she wants to keep talking, but I’d really prefer to get out of the heat. She said she might do that, and she was over in no time.

I found it interesting later because had I not been cleaning my apartment just prior to that, I would have pulled that out of my “Excuse Bag” as to why not to invite her over to my place since it was not clean enough to have over company, especially for the first time! I wanted her to get the full flavor or at least have a good experience while in my place. So, over she came, in she came, I got her some water, and we proceeded to chat for about 45 more minutes – I got back to my dryer with 1 minute to spare! Perfect.

So, I did most of the talking, initially, which is rare. I realized later often times it seems like others do all the talking and I just sit there even when I try to converse, but later we did have an actual conversation, back and forth. I told her all about my vacation, initially, at her request and we talked about other things as she chimed in with question after question. So, it was nice. A real conversation!!

So, my “help” may have come while in the laundry room previously when she’d been talking to me about her work situation, or lack thereof, and I, after asking if I may offer some insight, offered insight and perspective on how she might see her situation differently, namely, as an opportunity for her to ask God what He wants to do in her life currently, or how He wants her to respond, how He wants to grow her and perceive things instead of the negative spin that I’d previously felt and it was negative seeming for sure, but God is always in control still helping us in the tough times too, growing us in one way or another.  I put her life experience in perspective of her relationship with God and her life journey and what she would be able to derive from the seemingly negative experiencing she’s been having for a long time.  She, I think, took that in and had a revelation from it. Hopefully 😊

So, I hope that did help, for sure. I felt like I answered the call to invite her over for sure. A win for me. I hope it was good for her, too. I think it was. I think knowing you are wanted on some level always helps, too, and knowing someone cares enough to ask and listen and maybe pray for you makes people feel accepted too, and supported, both which are important. So, a win-win.

 I think what was interesting is when I lay in bed last night, I thought of ways to be more neighborly and check on her like today after her cataract surgery. I did and she was not home, but it felt good to think of ways to be good to someone. I am glad to have “loved my neighbor,” literally, yesterday. I was pleased by her coming over and I hope that she was too.

I am pleased to have followed through on the call to be neighborly and hospitable both by Joyce and by God. God comes through on those prayers for helping others, doesn’t He? I think he was smiling and pleased. 😊

Joyce would have been proud 😊

Holly

Thinking beyond “Hating Hard!”

We are not going to be at the same pace as everyone else in life, and it’s good to know where we are, what we need, in what gear we should be in, and when to shift up and down so we can meet our needs and our challenges in life.

However hard it got today, as in life, we must peddle on. It will get easier, the road and scenery will change, the wind will subside, and as you keep pressing on and staying the course, setting your pace, the challenge will become easier and you will become better and stronger along the way.

“I don’t like hard,” is what I found myself thinking today at some point in my “Bridges of Martin County” meetup ride this morning where I found myself struggling to keep up with my cohorts, unable to catch my breath, and in last place. I didn’t care about the rank, as I knew that would be where I would fall, but I will say having absolutely no visual of my cohorts at some point within the first 10 – 15 minutes was not where I was thinking I would fall at all, but I would press on. I committed to at least an hour only due to my knee condition and trying to rehab it, and I would do it with or without them.

I want to say, firstly, that biking is my favorite sport, probably. It’s the only 1 I have found myself breaking out in smiles, as I glide freely over the pavement, but when I have to push it, and struggle, and people are passing me left and right, even when one tells you repeatedly, “Holly, I am passing on your left, and I have to tell him, “Yeah, that’s my right,” as he struggles to narrowly zoom by me, on the right, and I wonder how someone our age can do so well in biking without knowing his left from his right, but I am just trying to stay upright and not get smooshed as one and all pass me by, over and over, again, until I figure they are all past me. I keep steady until finally, the last biker passes me by, and I find myself peddling up ever so slowly over the bridge as they are leaving me far behind. Once I made my ascent, I bid them adieu as they took a right after their descent from the bridge, and headed toward the beach.

As I made my eventual way in the same direction, I’d eventually wished I put on my odometer I got yesterday. They were nowhere in sight. How, exactly, slowly was I going? I figured I’d be pacing with them the whole time and would only be a little far behind and would not need it because I’d be in the range of the 16 – 22 mph if I were even on their back tails, but nowhere in sight?! Peddle on!

I knew I would find them again because they had to turn around after the beach and head back. I did catch up with them at that point, and we hollered at each other, and they sped away again really quickly, and I lost sight of them, again, in no time. I did have one woman in my view for much of the time, but still was ahead of me about a ½ mile, and she had a good 15 years on me – older! I was the youngest of the bunch, and the least in peddling shape! I peddled on knowing I’d again catch them in Jensen Beach in a mile or two. So, I peddled on, and that is when I thought, “I don’t like hard.” It may have been the dread I felt as I would still have to peddle all the way to Jensen beach and then turn around and hit those two bridges again. My leisurely, steady pace I would ride alone wasn’t sufficient for these guys. I did get this bike because I wanted to ride fast, but apparently, I have a ways to catch up!

I was doing my best, and peddled harder trying to make an effort, after thinking, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me,” and admitting too that though I know He can get me through it, I didn’t want to do it because I was having a hard time of it, and I don’t like hard! His grace was sufficient! I quickly got myself off that thought because I knew that that would only lead to misery. So, I focused more on Christ and His grace and being in the moment of doing what I could, and decided to push a little harder, I focused then on the fact that I have legs, and what a pleasure it is to be able to peddle, and do hard things that challenge me, and improve my physique, and build the legs, and specifically, my knee, (the reason I’d only committed to maybe 1 hour with them anyway today), and I eventually forgot about hard and was enjoying my Saturday morning doing something I’d been wanting to do – though still alone maybe, but that was okay. I was making an effort and that mattered, and I know over time, I will be better as I train more and maybe get clips and proper road-biking shoes instead of sneakers – I had that pointed out once I arrived, that no wonder I was so slow, and what a difference clips or straps make. Anyway, I found as I focused more on the good, I began enjoying my road trip and I looked up and was almost there.

My arrival in Jensen finally found them kickin it – relaxing, drinking water, laughing, talking.  I walked up the stairs eventually announcing gladly, “I made it!” I was accepted and cheered. They were glad for me I’d made it! I was too! I was pleased they are, and were, all so nice to me. They were welcoming initially and accepting. They were equally so despite my slowness when I arrived the second time. They accepted me all the while.

Meeting up, finally! And, capturing
the moment.

I realized as I walked from our first photo op spot to the next one that I was having a bit of difficulty walking because my muscles we so fatigued. Oh my!  Pretty cool though. I’d been wanting to strengthen my legs, and it was happening. I splayed myself out on the bottom step of this enormous chair as we took pics, exasperated looking, and fun about it! I like them – what a lively bunch! Maybe my bike people! So far so good.

Relaxing in the moment, Jensen Beach. Mocking my fatigued legs.

I decided to go back the same way despite what they said about continuing with them because I knew I’d have a bike lane the whole way. They said they’d been going unusually fast before and would be going slower. Not sure if they were testing out the newbie or what, but, in any case, I decided to go my own way too because I didn’t want to overdo my knee knowing I could potentially be out of commission for a few days as a result. I’m trying to take it easy and be realistic and take it slow so I can make real progress this time. I’ve seen how overdoing it every time sets me back over and over and I keep having to start over and over again.

So, I bid them adieu, this time, in person, and set back the way I came, but this time, against the wind. I didn’t mind it. I just down shifted as I needed and made it an enjoyable ride not dreading any of it – going at my own pace. I knew I could do the same when I hit the bridge – that’s a benny of a good road bike – I was huffing and puffing, but yes, I was making it, and I felt so great afterwards. I felt like this helped my spine too in the end which was good.

I took away that practicing focusing on the solution makes the difference, but this I already knew. I’m not sure anyone really likes hard, but we can do it, and I know I am always the better for having done it, and having done it intentionally, with integrity and some grace.

I feel like if you’re going to do it, do it. It’s always good to push ourselves, I believe, and that is why after realizing I hate hard, I began to push myself even harder because I believe that gets me over the hating it hump.

I think more than hating hard, I hate resisting hard, or resisting anything for that matter – it only makes it worse. Also, lazy, whiney and lame prove equally undesirable. So, I like to focus on the solution, and that is what I did and what I believe got my legs shaking! Going a little beyond. Pushing beyond to be better. I believe hard is able to be gotten over by just pushing back a little harder. Praying, focusing on the positive, gearing up and gearing down to make life’s rides more or less enjoyable, easy, thrilling or challenging is each individual’s choice. We set our own pace.

I needed to push in at times this a.m., but also keeping in mind my knee’s limitations and the impact my decisions would have. I am pleased to say that I have been doing great all day with no problems, except initially after I got home and cleaned a bit. I have rested it since, and it’s been awesome, and even feel my knees are stronger as a result. I am so grateful, and surprised, I have no pain! I must have done it right! 😊

We are not going to be at the same pace as everyone else in life, and it’s good to know where we are, what we need, in what gear we should be in, and when to shift up and down so we can meet our needs and our challenges in life. As Ecclesiastes says, unto everything there is a season. Many times, as of recent, hard has been where many of us have found ourselves.  Maybe it’s a personal challenge or physical challenge or just a hard goal you are setting for yourself.

I always focus on the solution. Find the positive. Break, if I have to, or press in even harder, and pray my way through it, making the most of your ride and setting my own pace. I am just beginning to do the latter more realistically. And, I am having to remember to be kind to myself along the way and also realistic with my own expectations and achievements, but to push myself too.

I had to remember today as I rode to look up and around and enjoy the gorgeous scenery of my ride, and feel the wind on my body, and though it was super strong, I simply down-shifted so I could enjoy the ride a little more and be gentler on my knee. However hard it got today, as in life, we must peddle on. It will get easier, the road and scenery will change, the wind will subside, and as you keep pressing on and staying the course, setting your pace, the challenge will become easier and you will become better and stronger along the way. That’s what derived from my ride today after pushing beyond hating hard!

May we ride with grace and integrity being true to ourselves and setting a realistic pace that allows us to derive the growth, strength and sometimes even pleasures we get to achieve from facing our hard times with an inner drive that gets us to our next levels in life.

May we all peddle on with grace.

Holly

A Christmas Blessing – Being Alone and Fulfilled

This year, I spent Christmas morning by myself. What is the blessing in that? Knowing Jesus. I went to church last night in a perfunctory spirit, but then began to focus on Jesus and what his birth signifies to me on the way there – Oh Come All Ye Faithful began to spring from my mouth. Verbalizing this gratitude to Him this morning brought me to tears. It’s always such a grateful tear to think of truth in what he does for us – who he is. What a gift, for sure. Comfort and Joy, Yes!

What I took from the service was keep your light shining – that is the reason I wanted to go anyway – to be a part of the candle lighting ceremony – there is something beautiful about seeing people’s “lights shine” as they hold candles. Christ has given me so many reasons to shine, and to think of those is what I must do most – keeping my focus on Him, because yes, in all circumstances, that will give me peace and joy. 

I found two things from listening to the sermons these past weeks – about the joy and the peace of the season – of knowing Jesus. Sometimes we need to lose what is around us to find what is in us. That is what I have found this year. Focusing on Jesus because I have no family to focus on. It’s just me this year. So, focusing on Jesus in me this year is what I got welled up by – as I gave thanks for Him and all he has and does for me! So grateful for this relationship I have. I have always known of his peace and joy, but this year, I heard it in a way that made me really hear – it verbalized what I have experienced, and made it more real to me, and I now know this in a way that though I’ve known, needed to have heard it first, verbally, to make more truth and relevance out of it. He is peace and joy in me, Yes! I am “the joy of the Lord, and He is my strength😊.” Amen, amen.

I love that Jesus is in me and with me and for me and loves me and does give me peace and joy in and out of the storm – there is nothing like knowing the love of God, and that is what this season is, but knowing that is yours everyday is big, and is the gift that gives, forevermore. And, I…love…that! It’s forever. Never leaving or forsaking us.

So, being alone as a believer – I am never alone, and that I know, and believe. I feel his presence though I am alone. I love that!

That is what keeps me in peace and joy because I focus on who He is and the gratitude I have and so much more because of Him. There is no other relationship that provides me with this depth and knowing and certainty of what a relationship with the holy Christ provides to me.

In this way, may you know what love God has for you in all times, and where ever or whoever you are, in any season of your life. It is no greater gift or better love than that!

May you know that you are never alone, and if you are a non-believer, get the eternal gift of love in Jesus from God. Just ask, and you shall receive. He is for you and for us all😊 It’s a life-altering gift, for the much, much better. Just accept 😊

Halleleuia!

Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays😊

Holly

How “our memory of another either furthers or hinders him…” – Neville

How to Forgive

Have you ever wondered why you might seem to regress back to a person you once were with certain people, even though you have long since grown out of that being? It is a likely more prominent type of experience you may have had within families, but it can happen in all relationships. I have seen it in my own experiences: in my family, and in other relationships, as well.

Today I listen to an audiobook which I find revelatory and seems to answer the “Why?” of this interesting phenomenon. I have experienced breakthrough in certain relationships because of my forgiveness of them, but certain interactions arise in relationships which continue to persist ever uncomfortably, and I have often thought I can’t seem to get out of a relationship pattern because of the other person – they continue to hold me in a certain state, and I stay, or have stayed, in that state because of their perception of me which I’ve believed in, or it seems so real in that person’s presence I continue to act the part dictated or perceived by them. It’s pretty interesting, really irksome, and has made me very sad and hurt, so here, I believe, is my key out.

I will preface this with saying, additionally, that what I am presenting by Neville still makes it another’s responsibility to free me from my behavior, seemingly, but I am going to take it, reasonably so, to the next level, and claim my own real power in creating the situation which breaks me free from another’s perception of me that we may both be free to see each other clearly, and, simultaneously, as our highest self dictates.

One more thing, I believe sometimes people treat us a certain way because we have set up in our reality, a perception of them that causes us to be treated that way. Had I not judged this person for being cruel, making them cruel until I forgive them and see them otherwise, they would not be really cruel at all, towards me! My freedom arises then from this – my perception of the person being something other than cruel, better than that, who they are projecting, for whatever reason, to a higher state of self – by rejecting the fact and creating the faithful truth.

My reasoning here then, ultimately, gives me freedom to be whom ever I choose whether perceived badly by another or not because it is my perception of another perceiving me badly, right or wrong, in my mind, which needs healing, correction, and freedom. I merely think beyond what I see. Imagine the best form of myself, them, the interaction between the two of us, and it makes itself real, in time, given I perceive fully, what it will feel like to be in that experience.

I love this book – the works of Neville (Goddard) – this mystic from the middle of the last century, whose writings I am so clearly resonating with. I believe them to be true because of how they feel to me – the biblical nature on which they are founded, and the truths which I cannot seem to deny in the reading of them, and feeling of the light they bring. I look forward to practice them more in my life. I have already begun, realizing what they offer.

I am putting an excerpt from Neville Goddard’s book here, The Complete Reader. I have also listened to Ultimate Potential – powerful. May you be led to and oddly more practical application of the truth here:

Holly

Excerpt from a Chapter on Attitudes by Neville Goddard: The Complete Reader

Memory, though faulty, is adequate to the call for sameness if we remember another as we have known him. We recreate him in that image, and the past will be recognized in the present. Imagining creates reality. If there is room for improvement, we should reconstruct him with new content.

Visualize them as we would like him to be, rather than having them bear the burden of our memory of him.

Everything possible to be believed is an image of truth.

The following story is one who believes that imagining creates reality and acting on his belief changed his attitude towards stranger and bore witness to this change in reality. More than 20 years ago when I was a green farm boy newly arrived in Boston to attend school, a pan handler asked me for money for a meal. Although the money I had was pitifully insufficient for my own needs, I gave my was in my pocket. A few hours later, the same man by this time staggeringly drunk, stopped me again asked for money. I was so outraged to think the money I could so ill afford had been put to such a use. I made myself a solemn pledge and I would never again listen to the plea of street beggar. Through the years I kept my pledge, but every time I refused anyone my conscious needled me. I felt guilty even at the point of developing a sharp pain in my shoulder but I couldn’t bring myself to unbend.

The early part of this year man stopped as I was walking my dog and asked for money so he could eat. Due to the old pledge, I refused him. His manner was graciously accepted my refusal. He even admired my dog and spoke of a family New York State he knew that raised Cocker spaniels. This time my conscious was really pricking me. As he went on his way, I determined to remake that scene as I wished it had been. (This “pruning” technique is described fully by Neville else where, but it recreates to past to make it what we’d wished it be, with amazing results!) So I stopped right there on the street closed my eyes for only a few moments and acted the scene differently.

In my imagination, I had the same man approach me, only this time you open the conversation by admiring my dog. After we had talked a moment. I had him say, I don’t like to ask you this but I really need something to eat. I have a job that begins tomorrow morning, but I’ve been out of work, and I’m hungry. I then reached into my imaginary pocket pulled out an imaginary $5 bill and gladly gave it to him. This imaginal act immediately dissolved all the guilty feeling pain.

I know from your teaching that this imaginal act is fact so I knew I could grant anyone what he asked and by faith in the imaginal act consent to the reality of this one having it.

Four months later as I was again walking my dog the same man approached me and open the conversation by admiring my dog. “He’s a beautiful dog,” he said. “Young man, I don’t suppose you remember me, but a while back I asked you for some money you very kindly said, “No.” I say kindly because if you had given it to me, I would still be asking for money. Instead, I got a job the very next morning, now on my feet, and have some self-respect again.

I knew his job was a fact when I imagined it some four months ago, but I won’t deny there was immense satisfaction in having him appear in the flesh to confirm it. FB.”

This ends part of that story. All of Nevill’s teachings are backed by corrobrating stories making that all that much more believealbe.

I am including some other powerful tidbits from this chapter, as well.

“I have no silver and gold, but I give you what I have.” Acts 3:6 None is to be discarded. All must be saved, and our imagination, reshaping memory, is the process whereby the Salvation is brought to pass.

To condemn the man for having lost his way is to punish the already punished.

(I realize I have done this a lot, and as I was “pruning” an event from my childhood yesterday, realized I’d been doing that. It’s illogical to punish someone for something they don’t possess. I’m so grateful for this “pruning” technique offered by him!)

Whom should I pity, if I pity not the sinner who’s gone astray?

Not just what a man was, but what he may become, should be our imaginal activity.

If we imagine no worse of him than he himself, he would pass as excellent. It’s not the man at his best, but the imaginist, exercising the spirit of forgiveness, that performs a miracle.

Imagine, with new content transformed, both the man who asked and the man who gave. Imagine is not yet had to do in the systems either moralist or educators. When it does, there will be the openings of prisons for those who are bound.

Nothing has existence for us, save for the memory we have of it. Therefore, we should remember it not as it was, unless it was of course altogether desirable, but as we desire it to be  in as much as imagining is creative.

Our memory of another either furthers or hinders him, and makes his upward or downward way easier and swifter.

There’s no coal of character so dead that it will not glow in flame if it lightly turned.

End Exerpt

Forgive is Latin for “perdonare,” meaning “to give completely, without reservation.” I am saying then, let us give to others all the good we can think of who they would be in Christ – beauty for ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair (Isaiah 61:3), being all the good that is in them, instead of in what has been brought upon them or that which they’ve chosen to espouse.

We can bring down heaven on earth to our fellow man, and to ourselves, while we forgive!

In the image of God is how we are all made, according to Genesis 1:27. Sometimes, we need to remember for others how they were made until they can remember for themselves, and sometimes it takes us envisioning the highest reality of our Father’s image for them, for them to become it.

Jesus, instructing us in the Lord’s prayer, tells us, “…and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive others.” It’s almost like we can’t get out of our trespasses until we let others out of theirs. Remember that Jesus let off the woman in adultery because no one could cast the first stone, and because her fellow man did not condemn her, neither did he, but he also said, “Go and sin no more.” My point is, condemnation comes on us by us, or so it seems, and there is no condemnation in those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the spirit. (Romans 8:1) This resonates with more of Neville’s teachings on how what we see is fact, and what we don’t is faith (the spirit world), and that world, in the spirit of God, is THE truth, whereas this is all imaginings that are fleeting. the truth is, in sprit, we are all already perfect. We’ve just forgotten! We are all perfect. So, seeing through and with those eyes, we will help to unite ourselves with ourselves and with others, as well, as we walk by faith and not by sight (II Corinthians 5:7)

Maybe we are hating because we feel hated. Forgive them for hating you or being hateful, and you won’t feel the hate. I say you will likely feel love and compassion for them, instead! 😊

Maybe you are having people be cruel towards you because your thoughts toward them are cruel. Forgive them for being cruel and you won’t have people be cruel to you. Stop criticizing others for choosing to be less than they can be. People act out of their own sense of identity. So, help a brother out, and be your brother’s keeper, and see yourself and others as being, as Philipians 4:8 states, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.”

This is how we are all instructed to be, and being this, peace will be sown in our minds, in our world and in ourselves. We all will peacefully live life together in union.

Holly

Practicing the Word of God

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. (Psalm 119:105)

During the trials we are all facing in the world at this time, we are at a place when, more than ever, maybe, we, as Christians, should be practicing the word of God, employing our knowledge of it into the very circumstances of our lives that we are helped, of course, but that so are those around us. Christians are called to be “set apart” by our behavior, and in the trying circumstances and trials of life, if we live in the word, we may be a light shining into the darkness for our fellow Christians to be encouraged, and to non-believers, alike, for a manner of being which is peaceful in the storm, which perseveres under trials, which in no thing complains, and in all circumstances, is grateful. Why? Because we are called to. We are children of the light  – we are the children of God, we are the sons and daughters of the most high God, and especially because we have so great a “cloud of witnesses around us, we should lay aside every weight which so easily besets us, and run the race we are called to run, keeping our eyes set on Jesus who is the author and finisher of our faith.”

What good is scripture if we do not employ it when we need it? As believers, if we do not have it hidden in our hearts, it will be more challenging, maybe to know what to do, and to hear from the Holy Spirit. I will admit, He can still get us the message, if He wants, to get the point across, and speak to us in our circumstances, if He so chooses. I did not have a bit of scripture “hidden in my heart” during one of my many trials, but I did hear the Holy Spirit give me a particular scripture which when I read, helped me tremendously. “All things work together for good for those who love God and who are called according to His purpose.”

After I read that, I was immediately calmed of my fears of being laid-off, and went into work (I’d taken off the morning to lament over maybe being laid-off, and fortunately, I never was) because I knew the Lord had me after I read that. I trusted him.

If you believe in God, in Christ Jesus, I encourage you to know and memorize His word. It is life. Not knowing or using the word of God in our lives is like having AAA to help you when your car breaks down, but instead of you using the resource you have to help you from your circumstance, you make yourself miserable, focusing only on the problem. You make more of the problem than is present and only choose to see it and what it is doing to you instead of being your own problem-solver, and using what you have to help you, to help you. The problem then becomes all about you and poor you. You enter your broken-down car and cry, “Woe is me!” Your plight becomes a beacon which calls attention to the “poor me” in you. The problem with the car becomes you. I have suffered today. I have had a trouble or a trauma. Moan, moan, moan! It’s taken on a new form you may give it because maybe somewhere in your psyche, you like having problems. Maybe you like being victimized. Maybe you like having attention drawn to you through your problems. Or maybe you have just had unenlightened role models who did the same things which are now your pattern also. Instead of focusing on the solution, the problem becomes you and you only choose to see it, failing to use your resources and knowing how to get out of it. And maybe, because of a lack of experience, you fail to call AAA in your circumstance because though you know they might be there for you, you trust them not because you think you’re too far out of the way or the problem is too large for them handle, so you fail to call them from faithlessness or lack of experience with them showing up for you, so you stay in your condition of breakdown not knowing the full extent of your freedom your resource offers you. I feel like many of us Christians fail to live the life we are offered because we fail to know the word, trust the Lord in seeing us through our circumstances in the tough times, and allowing the Father to show up for us when those times occur so we can build our faith and trust in Him, over and over again, to build a relationship that we will know is real. Our relationship with the Father can be built really only when times are tough. That’s how the Lord is able to present Himself – when you know that is it ONLY Him who makes what happens happen. That is too neat. And, what I have found is my relationship with Him really built most when it had a chance to be tried – I had some really challenging times in my life where He showed big to where I knew it was only Him. I pressed in to what I new about Him from his word, and employed my faith. I began to practice the word. I let go and did my part, and God showed up hugely! I have lots of testimonies on that if you want to search my site or listen to them on hollycobrien.com or see them on Youtube.

We are all incapable of escaping life’s breakdowns. Trouble visits us all in one form or another. I encourage those of us who have the greatest resource of all time in Christ Jesus, the Holy Spirit and the Father to practice being a follower, not just a believer. Practicing the word of God is what changes and builds us. I am encouraging us to make the most of our trouble or trauma. Focus on the solution. Employ the word in the tough circumstances of our lives. Fix the car! Call AAA! You have the resources. Use them. I feel the word of God is what gives life, and practicing the word is a life- saving resource for us all that I have found invaluable.

I have felt terribly sorry for those people who do not have Christ in their life to call on with certainty. Call they can, and He will help them, but I really feel for those poor souls who don’t know the maker of our Universe or maybe worse, who don’t care to know Him or have so little faith they can’t know Him.

Many of us do know Him, and many of us do not play like we do. We will help many, including ourselves, if we are salt and light to our generation. One to another, fellow believers lifting one another up, but also shining before men. 14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5: 14 – 16

Whether we are actually doing something, in deed, for someone else, or simply responding to life’s circumstances in ways we are called to, by “keeping our eyes on God so he will keep us in perfect peace,” by “acknowledging God in all our ways that He will direct our paths,” or by being “peaceful in the storm,” we can be the men or woman of God we are called to be to walk in good works to help ourselves and others in our times of greatest hardship. This is where the rubber meets the road and where every relationship is tested. These are the greatest gifts when we can see the Father of the Universe see us through the storm and show himself strong for us.

There is such a freedom I have found in following the word of God. Whether it’s “not to fret,” or to “pray for my enemies,” I have found peace and restoration in practicing the word of God. I have felt the grace of compassion showered upon me and increased my faith in the Father and I practiced and walked in knowledge of the word.

It is powerful, more powerful than any two-edged sword. It is our weapon with which we are to fight the enemy. It is living and life giving. It is so good.

Our Father has given us a roadmap, our instructions for life: “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: [17] That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.”

So, with the word of God in our head and heart, we have a better way for navigating our lives.

We will not be without trials. But this we can be certain, we should count it as all joy, according to the apostle James, when we enter into divers (various) temptations – whether tempted to be other than we are called to, whether to trust man over God, whether to fear job loss or losing friends, children or spouses. We are called to come higher with God.

He calls us ever higher to walk with Him, and to trust Him beyond what we can see or know. We are to walk by faith and not by sight, knowing His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and though we may not understand why we are going through what we endure, we are encouraged in Philippians 4: 6 – 8 by the apostle Paul “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

“8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

May you begin/continue practicing walking in the word of God, employing it in every circumstance of your life that you may be able to have what Jesus died for us all to have, life and life more abundantly.

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. Matthew 5: 16

May you be encouraged by this message today, becoming more than just a believer, becoming a follower of the Word.

Holly

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Obedience – A Christian Perspective on Why We May or May Not Be Obedient to the Holy Spirit.

The thing about being obedient is when we are, we may never know what it would have been like if we did it out way. But I am less willing to miss out on what God’s plan is for me than I am for my own plan.

Question – Are you one of those people who hears from the Holy Spirit? Or, are you one of those people who think those people are nuts or may be schizophrenic who think they hear from God? I am the former, and have found certain Christian “friends” being concerned I was schizophrenic and laughing at me when I mentioned it once years back when in one of my “becoming Catholic” classes.

Running a few days back, at the end of mile 1, I hear, “2.”

Psyche – My psyche psyched me out. I turned around and kept it at 2 miles only, having my rationales as to it being better for me than 4 miles because that is too much, I can’t do that, I am likely not that hydrated, and so on. At the end of the 2 miles, though, I thought maybe I was supposed to have run for 2 after the first – kept going. I didn’t want to. It was a lot, and I hadn’t run 4 miles in years. The most I’d run since I started running again was just over 3 recently, and I’d only run just under 2.5 on the beach which is where I was at the time. I did not want to run that hard – it is very hard to run on the soft sand of the beach.

I walked around and played at running more, questioning whether or not I was to have run more. Back and forth in my mind the craziness continued, and when it did, I remembered I heard someone say that failing to be obedient causes confusion. That’s where I was. My justifications were not louder than the still small voice. The knowing. The, you got here early today – there is no sun now due to the haze when it is normally already strong at this time. You have plenty of hydration. You were prompted by God, so you KNOW that when that happens, you are able.

It’s a matter of being lazy and not wanting to put in the effort b/c it’s hard – that’s the truth of it all. But I remembered too that I’d recently felt the need to push myself more too b/c there is something that is driven out of us, me, when we pursue more and work harder – the laziness, or unwillingness or complaints of the difficulty – all the lack, insecure, lazy, weak mentalities that hold me back at times. What I wanted really was to conquer. And, as I kind of ran back and forth, to and fro for awhile while decided what I would do, thinking I’d still need hydration which I did not, still looking for an excuse not to do what I figured I was being prompted to, I found I’d already gone about a mile in the deciding – and only 1.1 more miles, I can do that, I figured. Then, I ran on.

4 miles under my belt that day on the beach, the soft sand. It was a good accomplishment, and OF COURSE, I felt really good afterwards. Grateful.

What I know, is yes, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, and I do believe I said that a time or two as I ran, but even more, when I know the Lord asks or prompts me to do something I might not want to do, A. it is for my own good, and B, I can complete it because He has called me to it.  I had no excuses. I love knowing that!

The worry for me, besides it’s challenging and I’ve not been at this terribly long – the working to strengthen my knees and legs still – is hydration. The main part is the heat. Typically, in Florida, if you are out after 8 a.m., it’s too late, for me, to exercise. Given I’ve been out a lot past that recently, it has been hazy some days which makes it easier, but it still compounds an already challenging feat whether you are hydrated or not. It takes the wind out of me to keep on keeping on during the drudgery of the sand. I did get to a point, however, recently, where I ran the two miles like it was nothing. I liked that! Milestones are great!! And, I love to achieve them and celebrate them. It’s good making progress!

So, I ran and I guess that’s when it dawned on me – I recalled how interesting it was that I got up so early that day – I’d been resisting getting up before the sun for pretty much all of the summer, but that day I was up, and I was out early, and hydrated. Though I was early enough for the sunrise at 6:30ish, it never shone b/c of the haze, and it continued like that for almost the whole hour I was out there.  That’s when I realized God knew I could do it. He got me up early, got me out there, made sure I was hydrated enough and told me to go for 2 miles when I wanted to stop at 1. I insisted that the 2 was what I would stop at. After getting back from the 2 miles, however, and not needing water was when the debate in my mind started, and the lack of obedience ran me in circles literally. If people knew what went on in my mind sometimes :)! Ha! Now some know:)

Well, I am so grateful to have done it because not only did it remind me of how important it is to be obedient to stave off the crazies and confusion over making the right decision, but it reminds me that God is in the small things of my life – in my training, helping me still to “strengthen my knees that they do not become lame.” Finally, it reminds me that He can be, and is, TRUSTWORTHY:) He is my Father and my best-friend. I am always being helped more by His promptings and guidance, just like a good father will try and do.

So, the take-aways then – Listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit – He is always leading us for what is best for us. Following brings obedience which always brings a blessing. Blessing brings joy. Joy brings peace. Peace brings happiness and sharing that that brings help, hope and joy to others, I hope.

My take-away, however, as I walked from the beach that day, after I got another prompting when I went to the water afterwards, I didn’t listen. I do not know why I keep “failing this test” even after I just had an assignment and “knew the material.” I think it’s my ego, the feeling of just wanting to be in control and do it my way, whatever it is, I felt very sad afterwards because I feel it dishonors the Lord. It puts me above Him, my ways above Him when His ways are so far above my ways I cannot even see.

I left with the take-away that I hoped that “sorrowful” feeling I’d felt from that most previous incident really leads me to repentance – to remember that in all my ways He is leading me and guiding me in all my ways, and what an honor it is that I have listening ears, and He actually communicates with me. It is awesome! I think sometimes, oddly, it’s still a way of A. yes, asserting me in my life, of giving me control over me, but B. too, making sure it is Him and I can actually hear and trust Him. Whatever it is, I can trust Him and making an effort to listen more faithfully and honor him – I am reminded now. It takes slowing down a minute to obey because sometimes I am going so fast, and may use that as an excuse of not having time to “catch up” to be obedient to what You said, but it is just another excuse, and I am not prone to lies or believing them. Just be honorable and follow through 🙂

The thing about being obedient is when we are, we may never know what it would have been like if we did it out way. But I am less willing to miss out on what God’s plan is for me than I am for my own plan. “For as the heavens are higher than the Earth, so are His ways higher than our ways.”

I left praying, tearfully, that I had “sorrow unto repentance” so I may follow His word, even the little promptings I get, in following of His good plan for my life – the big and the small, and the small are sometimes more of what I love the most because they are often so tender and intimate.

In that, I have to pause, remember, and take heart, for He is loving and trustworthy.

Holly

Goodness of Him: Restoring love between a father and daughter

The only real change comes from the grace of God (video excerpt).

I forgot today was Father’s Day until I went in to church this morning. And, I forgot I made this video too (among others), in honor of God’s amazing work in my life, until I was making lunch and thinking about my dad and God, and the gratitude for the healing work the word of the Lord brought to my life-long hurts, and severed relationship I had with my dad, and how the Lord healed all, miraculously through His grace, one afternoon after a prayer by a prayer partner in Life Church (England church which helped to change my life).

May you love your Father in heaven with your whole heart, and know His great love for you, and may He heal your relationship with your father or child, as he has mine through the word of Malachi 4:6 And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.

In honor of my Father in Heaven and my dad, in heaven. I am so grateful for the marvelous relationships I have with you, and was able to have, even if only, truly, for a short time.

Holly

My testimony recounting the story of God’s grace showering me with compassion to forgive and love my father.

Our last Christmas together. A good reunion, 2009.

Month 6, My Focus: The Endocrine System. I Think My Skin Is Healing!

Ok, so it has been over five 5 months since I started my journey to heal my Idiopathic Guttate Hypomelanosis, and I have finally begun to seen some results!!

The melanocytes in my legs have slowly failed to produce melanin more and more over the past 9+ years. I began to see what I thought were big results on my thighs some weeks back in that I noticed I was seeing more of my brown spots, caused from an overproduction of melanin, than my white spots, no melanin production. I felt I was looking for the white spots but I was able to still see them. I was ready to share my news. But, the other night as I looked at my legs, it looked like there were more white spots. It occurred to me that maybe it was because I got some sun on my legs the day before. After I came back from running, and I got ready for my shower, I noticed I had a “runners” tan from my early morning run. This is Florida, afterall:)

So, when looking at my legs and seeming to see more white spots, I figured it was maybe because of the sun. I thought it was because I was eating sugar too. One of the things I was told was that, among this condition not being “curable,” it is also made worse by the sun and to steer clear. However, this article indicates research does NOT support photodamage as a prerequisite for the development of IGH making me think maybe it is still a fungus, but you think the “experts” would know. My thoughts about eating sugar again and seeing more spots is because I have thought it may be a fungus – it presents like one in so many ways – the shape, the slow spread and the persistence. Another place in the article does seem to contradict itself indicating the absence of the macules is due to solar radiation.

So, either I actually do have more spots in January, as it does seem to be the case as evidenced by the photos – I look tanner in January, too, which could just be elucidating the spots more – or I don’t. I am not sure! I have thought I could visibly tell they are reducing, so I am going to go with that, and they do look to be fewer in this recent photo, too. Summer is on the way, so I will be getting tanner just by way of being outside, so time will surely tell. However, to also address the potential fungus issue, I am going to keep my white flour & sugar to a low (fungus, like all organisms, love and thrive on sugar), keep eating well, taking my probiotics (which can also by way of increasing their populations, keep off the “fungal” populations), and just keep progressing in the direction of well-being. I am not sure I will continue to research further body systems beyond this month because I do not see a correlation between them, but I’ll see. I never knew the the endocrine system produced a hormone to stimulate melanin production! So…

I have persisted in the other areas, off and on, in which I’ve engaged in since working on different body systems since January. I am inadvertently taking a systemic approach at this point. I’m still supplementing with a lot of different supplements, drinking lots of smoothies, exercising, rarely overeating, eating less white flour/sugar, using Selson blue to scrub my legs with in the shower with a scubber likely used by masochists, I am taking probiotics, and I continue to research ways I can address how my body may make more melanin.

Onto the hormonal relationship.

Having recently found out there is actually a hormone responsible for making melanin, it’s called, aptly, Melanin Stimulating Hormone and is “stimulated” by the anterior pituitary gland in my brain, or so it should be, I was encouraged that maybe this is somehow the root of my problem. I am still not sure why it is failing to produce in my legs! So I am pursing the endocrine study this month to see what’s up with that and if there is something I can do to help my legs, here!

I read this study, Hypopigmented Macules of Photodamaged Skin and Their Treatment with Topical Tretinoin, which I found really interesting for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I found out that this Retin- A cream, Tretinoin, that I bought in Mexico in February for my face has actually been studied and used successfully for this problem. I have begun to use this on my legs, but the tube is now flattened, and ready for repurchase.

The issue with this cream is 2-fold – yes, it works, see the picts in the study, but not only are the “macules” lighter, the whole of the skin is lighter – issue 1. The 2nd issue is that after discontinuation of use, they returned over time. I am not looking for a temporary fix, but a long-term, permanent solution to my skin issue. Oh yea, you also should stay out of the sun when using this. Ugh. That’s a no for sure! I am outside pretty much every day, but I do and will use sunscreen more regularly and thoroughly.

I found something in this article fascinating. Researchers suggested “the
presence of a systemic factor in the development of IGH, because IGH epidermis transplanted into mice re-pigmented after 3 weeks. Restoration of pigmentation indicates that melanocytes, though inactive, are present in
hypopigmented macules.

So, my melanocytes (melanin-producing cells) are in tact, according to this, likely, and fun fact: we have 1000 – 2000 melanocytes per square mm – Wow, my task now is to figure out why, still my task, they are not producing melanin! As this studying, indicates, however, this is systemic. For me to have been on the path of, pin-pointing, oh, I need copper or I need more vitamin A or I need to boost my immunity – this is larger, maybe than I am making it. But, maybe not. Idiopathic indicates the origin of the pathogenesis is not known. So, it’s rough, especially since I am not being systematic about it in the sense of controlled studies.

Well, this makes me think that yes, maybe this will be my last focus this month because of the systemic nature of this. In a way, I am, and have been, overtime, as I mentioned, inadvertently developing a systemic approach to healing this, as I have learned new bits each month, I am continuing to employ each of them, but less so. Still, maybe over time, it will alleviate myself of this condition as I persist!

In the meantime, I will be looking at, for the rest of this month and more, my hormones, hormonal homeostasis (balance), melanocyte receptors and the effect cholesterol may be having on my skin.

I gave blood last month and found out my cholesterol has gone up 30 points in the past 8 years. It’s over 180 and in the red one! I have purchased a cholesterol meter so I will monitor this too over this month to get it down. I have already bought and been eating wheat germ which is supposed to be great to reduce cholesterol, but we make cholesterol naturally. Cholesterol makes our sex hormones, and is part of all our cell membranes. So, maybe this high level of cholesterol has something to do with my problem, or maybe i just had umpteen cups of coffee with excess cream that morning, and my cholesterol levels were only high because of that. Going to get to the bottom of it!

Here’s to My Health & Yours:)

Holly

Overview of My Progress on My Face and Legs

5 Months: My Healing Process – I Need Specific Goals in Order to Progress.

I have realized this about myself this month – if I don’t have a specific goal, I don’t really progress. In my “absence” of progress, however, I have found how to better progress in my life, and that I am better with goals – whether they be physical, mental, spiritual, professional, or personal – what ever they are – I am more efficient with them, and happier to a degree – they make me feel like I am striving toward something and personally achieving something too which I always like. So, though my blood might not yet be cleaner, and I have murkied up my waters a bit in my aimlessness, I have made progress again, still, mentally which is impacting me on a spiritual and physical level, too, and clearing my path for success.

It’s time to get S.M.A.R.T! Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely. I am reminded that these goals are what I need in order to make better progress in my life with my life for whatever it is I a trying to achieve. I need goals for me to progress with more passion and gusto and to see more results in both my health and other aspects of my life for me to succeed. Furthermore, I need to commit to them and carry them out, the kicker. Otherwise, entropy takes over and I am lost in space, accomplishing nothing. SMART goals coupled with commitment, is my path forward 🙂

One thing I have realized about myself is if I am not able to see change in something, I am not likely to do it. I like being able to quantify things. I like making and seeing progress. I have been trying to figure out why I was not actively pursuing cleansing my blood, as my main pursuit of “healing” my cardiovascular system in an effort to help clear up my skin condition, as I had my other body systems. I’m in my 5th month of working on clearing up my skin, diagnosed with idiopathic guttate hypomelanosis. My thinking: if my body is in perfect homeostasis, and has all the proper nutrition it needs, it will heal itself. I have made a dermatologist’s appointment for next month, as there is little change, but I do think there is some :), in my skin after 5 months. I have, however, heard it can take up to a year to heal this, and it’s taken about 9 years to develop – so, I’m right within my yearly healing plan, maybe.

Back to it – I came to the reason for barely pursuing cleaning my blood to being that I have not thought I would see progress, in addition to the fact that I was going to focus on juicing. I think the latter is what has deterred me the most honestly. I tried juicing only once this month so far, and am easily deterred by it, remembering more why I don’t do it. I’m not a fan of juicing.

Juicing is messy, and I have since found myself bothered at how wasteful it is, as well. I will say, however, the first and only day I have juiced, so far, I made beet juice with apple, spinach and carrots I think it may have been the best drink I’ve ever made and had in my life. It was so delicious! Another issue, however, is that you hardly get anything for what you put in:

Beet, Carrot, Apple and Spinach deliciousness. Not much B for B, but it’s tasty, and super healthy! And, it’s so pretty in color! 🙂

I must have needed it also for it to be so good, too, I surmise. I had this happen to me the first time I ever juiced carrots over 20 years ago, which I never liked cooked, but when juiced, I found were delicious! Maybe my body needed them, that is what I guessed at the time. I couldn’t figure out why else something I’d always hated would be so incredibly delicious to me! In addition to the mess and waste, I had very little juice actually produced, unlike my fruit and veg smoothies which produce a ton and keep me filled up for a long time. I am willing to pursue this more too, now that I will have more time, come Saturday, as my first official day of summer break, so I will pursue it more, then, with cleansing recipes. Yah! So happy for summer break and to be healthily and readily heading into it.

I am going to give this a go for at least three full days focusing on at least everything I should be to cleanse and alkalinize my blood – a 3 day cleanse. That work perfectly, time wise. It will take me out of this month and into the next where I will likely focus on the lymphatic system, continue to cleanse my blood, and get rid of my high cholesterol, hopefully. Tonight I bought my juice components – more beats, cucumber, ginger, lemon, cilantro, parsley and kale. I already have apples and carrots. For the next 3 days, I’m gonna hit it. It’s SMART:

  1. Specific: I will juice for at least 1 meal per day, and eat some food that is good for cleansing my blood at each meal over the next three days, to start. I will also carry out some form of cardiovascular exercise for my heart.
  2. Measurable: I will have 1 juice drink per day and at each meal food that will be cleansing I will walk, run, bike for at least 30 minutes/day.
  3. Attainable: I can do this for three days, ,and have everything I need to do to achieve this goal and monitor my progress.
  4. Realistic: This is achievable. I’ve already bought the food, have a juicer and have free time over the next 3 days. All goals set are realistic.
  5. Timely: 3 days – piece of cake. I can do it.

One thing I have gotten too is a smart watch – my phone however seems smarter, but it does not monitor my heart – one of the main reasons I got this baby. I have a resting heart rate of 62 according to my reading today – I just got this. But, as I just looked at my heart rate, and it’s at 50. A good, normal resting heart rate for adults is 60 – 100 beats per minute (BPM), and the fewer beats, the more efficient. A well-trained athlete is at about 40 bpm – a goal I can shoot for:)

I have realized this about myself this month – if I don’t have a specific goal, I don’t really progress. In my “absence” of progress, however, I have found how to better progress in my life, and that I am better with goals – whether they be physical, mental, spiritual, professional, or personal – what ever they are – I am more efficient with them, and happier to a degree – they make me feel like I am striving toward something and personally achieving something too which I always like. So, though my blood might not yet be cleaner, and I have murkied up my waters a bit in my aimlessness, I have made progress again, still, mentally which is impacting me on a spiritual and physical level, too, and clearing my path for success.

I need to get back on the horse. I have finally gotten back “on” sugar as of last week. Not a good result, either. I’d quit for Lent and didn’t go back until the middle of last week. I have had, since then, a pan of brownies, and a gallon (2 bogo 1/2 gallons) plus a quart of ice cream. Ice cream is my “island food.” It doesn’t seem like much when you are eating it, but it all adds up. I was shocked when I added this up. I have also seen, I think, the results on my thighs. Oddly, I have also gained weight I’ve noticed, but this was before I went back on sugar – odd. I’m guessing all the sitting in quarantine has caught up with me despite my good diet and exercise regime I’ve been on.

I was walking the other day and literally felt, and still do, my waist/torso on my arms as I walk, something that never had happen to me before, but now, I notice, and I’m not much of a fan, but I do have other perks – my “wrinkles” on my face have smoothed out a bit and I look younger – yah! Bigger breasts too, but barely:) I prayed for the former, and got heavier. It works:) Prayer, answered. Thanks, Lord!

At any rate, I will be “cleansing” my blood for three days straight come Saturaday and move on to body system 6 from there, but may pursue more of this blood cleansing and will be back to clean eating, as well. I have begun eating bread too, and a couple nights ago I felt sick to my stomach – I’d had a couple of egg sandwiches through out the day, and pizza at night and some ice cream. I lay in bed, even know it had been hours since I’d eaten, and I felt nauseous. I knew I had to get back to a better diet and I was glad I felt sick b/c I could see how my body responds to poor eating. I do believe I felt sick too as a result of all this poor eating for the past week. I like that my body needs good food, and I like eating that way too. I was glad to realize all this over the past day. Bread’s not all it’s cracked up to be, but it definitely has it’s place.

I was reminded last night that we are often given choices in life and need to make our choice between the extremes. For me anyway. I am all or nothing more often than not, and my all for now will be choosing health. It’s exciting to me too b/c I have 9 weeks of summer ahead of me to focus seriously on where I am physically – wholly – taking more seriously and to the next level my health and my life. And, I am starting for now, on the next three days.

I’m glad to be back on the healthy horse, progressing forward in the direction of improved health, making smart goals and planning for my many successes in my physical well-being which I know spills over into all of the other areas of my life. I’m glad too I get sick when I eat poorly, and that I need healthy food. I’m getting back on it! Yah! Juice cleanse, here I come.

To my health and yours!

Holly